The gods must be crazy

I cannot decide if I would rather be Apollo or Poseidon.

I spend my summers outside, soaking up the sun, so part of me would love to drive the chariot of the sun around the earth each day. My tan would be amazing. However, I also love water and think living underwater, riding hippocampi, and controlling hurricanes and earthquakes could be the best thing ever.

While I have always been interested in the Greek gods and mythology, Rick Riordan's book series, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, has recently rekindled my interest. My friends Jeremy and AJ told me about them over Christmas break, and after making a little trip to Barnes and Noble, I quickly fell in love with series.

The Lightning Thief tells the story of Perseus Jackson, a Manhattan sixth grader who struggles with dyslexia, ADHD, and getting kicked out of school. After his math teacher turns into a Fury and tries to kill him, and the Minotaur attacks him, his mother, and his disabled friend Grover, he realizes something strange is going on in his life.

Grover brings him to Camp Half Blood on Long Island where Percy realizes that Grover is a satyr, his Latin teacher is the heroic centaur Chiron, the Greek gods are real and have followed the shift of Western Civilization to the United States, and Percy's mysterious absent father is the sea god Poseidon. Percy, Grover, and their new friend (and possible love interest) Annabelle, daughter of Athena, set out on a quest to retrieve Zeus's stolen lightning bolt from the Underworld, running into the Furies, Medusa, the Lotus Eaters, and Echidna along the way.

I know that was filled with spoilers, but please deal with it. There are four more books in this series which contribute to one large story arc, and I have only scratched the surface of the thrilling plot. You do not need to know anything about Greek mythology to enjoy them, but knowing the back stories of characters and being able to predict plot points gave me extra satisfaction when reading. My favorite parts were the various interactions with the gods, who, unlike the God I worship, can be as petty and selfish as the mortals they rule.

When I saw that 20th Century Fox was making a film based on the first book, I was apprehensive. After all, films like The Two Towers and The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe have burned me with inaccuracies, leaving me wary of book-to-movie adaptations. I went to see the movie, Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief, on a Sunday afternoon at the Guthrie Theatre with my friend Melinda.

The film was the worst book-to-movie adaptation I have ever seen. Its many fallacies included making Percy seventeen instead of twelve, combining characters and love interests, portraying Persephone as a sexy devil's mistress, and making Grover a womanizing player. The most grievous change, however, was making the villain a stupid demigod instead of the fallen titan of time, Kronos. Because of this change, no logical sequel can be made to the film. I wonder if the film company realized the movie would tank half way through production and decided to cut their losses by simplifying the plot.

There were two parts of the film that I really enjoyed. The Medusa scene remained fairly true to the book and added an intensity to the movie. Uma Thurman played the gorgon as a fierce and beautiful woman who just happened to have snakes growing out of her head and the ability to turn people to stone. I also loved the Lotus Casino scene where Percy, Annabelle, and Grover ate the intoxicating lotus flowers and broke it down to Lady Gaga's "Poker Face" and Ke$ha's "Tik Tok." So good.

In conclusion, read the books and skip the movie. But you knew that already.