The evolution of Miley

Miley has never impressed me.

I remember wondering why people liked her when Hannah Montana started on the Disney Channel. Since my family has only the four basic channels, we only watched shows like that at grandma's house. When we first watched Hannah Montana, I immediately felt annoyed at the stupid jokes and laugh track, Miley's backwoods accent, and Billy Ray's far too glamorous hair.

The one highlight of the show was the episode(s) where Dolly Parton played Miley's godmother. Dolly looks so freaky after all of her plastic surgery and reminds me of a cat/insect hybrid. I am going to call her look "the Cheshire mantis."

I did not care for Miley's early music as well. Yes, "See You Again" and some of her songs were catchy, but they are also easy to mock. Her twangy voice comes across as a hybrid between country and pop, and unlike Carrie Underwood's music, the combination is unpleasant.

"The Climb" almost made me give up hope forever. That song makes my list of most overplayed and awful songs of the decade. Mily slurs the notes in her thick voice and sings about things beyond her comprehension. I found it highly appropriate that on this week's episode of Glee, Rachel Berry attempts to sing "The Climb" but fails due to laryngitis. Justice.

Then, however, Miley made a huge step in the right direction with "Party in the U.S.A." Who knew that "nodding your head like yeah" and "moving your hips like year" could be so fun? 16-year-old Miley received criticism for the music video in which she wear a low-cut shirt and short jean shorts. People thought she dressed inappropriately for her age.

First of all, 16-year-old girls dress like that all summer long. Short shorts may be tacky, but that is what they wear. Secondly, the video is just so fun. The whole thing is classic americana filled with American flag print, pickup trucks, cowboy boots, and jungle gyms. Miley's dance moves give her a competitive edge as well.

Now, it seems, Miley is ready to grow up. Her new album, Can't Be Tamed, presents an edgy Miley ready to become an adult and be treated like one. Miley's real-life behavior reflects this as well--she recently moved from the mansion she bought her parents and bought herself another mansion next door. She also just starred in the Nicholas Sparks' romantic comedy The Last Song. I doubt I will ever see it, but it seemed to be fairly popular.

The title track from Can't Be Tamed sounds great. Miley's voice reminds me of classic Britney mixed with autotune. Yes, Miley does need the autotune--please recall her abysmal performance for the Queen of England--but I do not really mind. She actually sounds better synthetic.

What I really love, however, was the music video. Miley emerges as Avis cyrus, an exotic bird creature being revealed to a crowd of wealthy bird enthusiasts. She quickly scares them away her with ferocious facial expressions, giant black wings, and wild background dancers. The video flashes back and forth between Miley in a black leather bird costume and Miley laying on a pile of peacock feathers dressed in a $25,000 corset dress.

Based on the amount of skin bared and suggestive dance moves, it seems that Miley is all grown up. People complain that Miley is only seventeen, but so was Britney when she started baring her belly button. I am not promoting this Gaga-esque video as morally sound, but I think it was a good career move for Miley.

Miley, keep channeling this new you. Just do not have babies, shave your head, and then attack paparazzi with an umbrella.