El viaje a Málaga

After three and half days of living out of a suitcase, we were ready to settle down.

We piled onto the bus bright and early, once again closing curtains, playing iPods, and wearing shades, hoping to sleep for part of our seven hour trip south. For the first half of the ride, I slept fairly well, putting myself in a Gaga-coma that carried me many miles down the road. Before you start hatin' on me for being inauthentic with my music while in Spain, I need to tell you that since arriving in Spain, I have heard almost exclusively produced music. Everywhere you go, Rihanna, Ke$ha, Gaga, and Beyonce follow you--even to the discoteca. Earlier today I watched a rough-looking Spaniard walk by my bus stop while playing Evanescence on his phone. Gaga is very español.

Eventually, however, the landscape become too exciting for me to stay in oblivion. Southern Spain is full of mountains and mesas, and covered in olivos (olive trees). Nothing but olive trees could thrive in the sandy soil, and the farmers have taken advantage of that fact. As we traveled we saw snow capped mountains in the Sierra Nevada range and abandoned buildings that looked as though that had been built hundreds and hundreds of years ago. I felt awed as the landscape continued to impress.

We took two breaks as we traveled, one around eleven and another around two for lunch. In America, breaks on bus trips usually last about ten-fifteen minutes, and maybe twenty-five, if it is time for lunch. However, in Spain, that would be simply impossible. We ate lunch at a rest stop in the nicest rest stop restaurant I have ever seen. We ordered el Menu del Dia which includes two courses, bread, drink, and dessert for an economical price. In what was becoming a pattern, Jen, Rubia, and Alejandro and I sat together. By the time this meal had ended, we had already been at the rest stop for over an hour and fifteen minutes. Oh Spain...

By the time we arrived in Malaga, everyone was pretty giddy. I felt nervous about meeting my Senora, my mom while I would be in Malaga. As we drove through Malaga towards the Cathedral, I noticed that Malaga was much different from the other cities we had visited. The buildings were more modern than that of Toledo but less cosmopolitan than those in Madrid. There were palm trees everywhere, and the whole city felt like it was dragging us to the sea. Our first view of the sea from the outskirts of Malaga got us more excited than anything else on the trip.

When we pulled up at the Cathedral, the Senoras were all lined up, ready to whisk us off to their casas. We looked out the bus windows, sizing the Senoras up. I hoped that Matt and I would not get the grouchy looking one standing by the bus door. Our director Heidi dismissed us from the bus a casa at a time. She introduced Matt and I to a dark haired woman standing in the back, and we gave one another the customary "dos besos." She asked me if I spoke Spanish. I said yes, and the Sra next to her told her how lucky she was.

Sra Maria Teresa Borrego Martinez led us to a taxi (my first taxi ride!) and directed the driver to take us to la Calle Santa Cristina. Senora spoke with me a little, and I found her strong Andalucian accent a bit difficult to understand. Andalucians do the ceceo where c's and z's sound like "th," drop a lot of s's at the end of words, and often drop d's, g's, and b's out of words. I have been working on developing this accent, but it is not the easiest thing to do! I was thankful that Srta Forrester's Phonetics class had prepared me for this accent, so that this was not the first time that I had heard it.

Upon arriving, we got out and wheeled our maletas to the building and brought them up the elevator to the fifth floor. Sra's apartment is quite spacious with two sitting rooms, one-and-a-half bathrooms, a kitched, a dining room, a terrace, and three bedrooms. Matteo and I share a bedroom and a bathroom. Our new mom gave us keys, showed us around, and encouraged us to unpack so that we could put our suitcases in her storage unit on the roof. When I called her Senora, she quickly corrected me and said to call her "Tere" which she pronounces like "TAY-day."

After unpacking, Tere asked us if we had brought computers. We were thrilled to find out that Tere has wireless internet, and she gave us the clave (password). Tere showed us around her apartment which is filled with art, books, and antique Arabic weapons. She told me that she is part Castillian and part Arabic. Her whole family has been in the military, and they own an art gallery somewhere. She is so cool.

We went to the beach after that and loved it. El Mar (Sea) Mediterraneo is cold cold cold, but the sun is also hot hot hot. To get there, we have to walk out our apartment door, cross the road, and sit down. Yes, we live that close. The beach by us is called La Playa Malagueta, and it is fairly popular. Tere told me that she goes there every day. I think that I probably will too. The darker I get, the more I will blend in with the Spaniards.

That night, Tere made us a bocadillo con jamon y huevos and patatas fritas with a little cup of flan. We would later discover that a sandwich, chips, and flan or yogurt would be the standard dinner for each night. After dinner, Matteo and I were really tired so we just got in bed and fell asleep around ten. Spanish night life would have to wait for another night.

Falling asleep to the sound of the waves hitting the sand is consistently amazing. La vida es brillante.


Click here for photos!

The evolution of Miley

Miley has never impressed me.

I remember wondering why people liked her when Hannah Montana started on the Disney Channel. Since my family has only the four basic channels, we only watched shows like that at grandma's house. When we first watched Hannah Montana, I immediately felt annoyed at the stupid jokes and laugh track, Miley's backwoods accent, and Billy Ray's far too glamorous hair.

The one highlight of the show was the episode(s) where Dolly Parton played Miley's godmother. Dolly looks so freaky after all of her plastic surgery and reminds me of a cat/insect hybrid. I am going to call her look "the Cheshire mantis."

I did not care for Miley's early music as well. Yes, "See You Again" and some of her songs were catchy, but they are also easy to mock. Her twangy voice comes across as a hybrid between country and pop, and unlike Carrie Underwood's music, the combination is unpleasant.

"The Climb" almost made me give up hope forever. That song makes my list of most overplayed and awful songs of the decade. Mily slurs the notes in her thick voice and sings about things beyond her comprehension. I found it highly appropriate that on this week's episode of Glee, Rachel Berry attempts to sing "The Climb" but fails due to laryngitis. Justice.

Then, however, Miley made a huge step in the right direction with "Party in the U.S.A." Who knew that "nodding your head like yeah" and "moving your hips like year" could be so fun? 16-year-old Miley received criticism for the music video in which she wear a low-cut shirt and short jean shorts. People thought she dressed inappropriately for her age.

First of all, 16-year-old girls dress like that all summer long. Short shorts may be tacky, but that is what they wear. Secondly, the video is just so fun. The whole thing is classic americana filled with American flag print, pickup trucks, cowboy boots, and jungle gyms. Miley's dance moves give her a competitive edge as well.

Now, it seems, Miley is ready to grow up. Her new album, Can't Be Tamed, presents an edgy Miley ready to become an adult and be treated like one. Miley's real-life behavior reflects this as well--she recently moved from the mansion she bought her parents and bought herself another mansion next door. She also just starred in the Nicholas Sparks' romantic comedy The Last Song. I doubt I will ever see it, but it seemed to be fairly popular.

The title track from Can't Be Tamed sounds great. Miley's voice reminds me of classic Britney mixed with autotune. Yes, Miley does need the autotune--please recall her abysmal performance for the Queen of England--but I do not really mind. She actually sounds better synthetic.

What I really love, however, was the music video. Miley emerges as Avis cyrus, an exotic bird creature being revealed to a crowd of wealthy bird enthusiasts. She quickly scares them away her with ferocious facial expressions, giant black wings, and wild background dancers. The video flashes back and forth between Miley in a black leather bird costume and Miley laying on a pile of peacock feathers dressed in a $25,000 corset dress.

Based on the amount of skin bared and suggestive dance moves, it seems that Miley is all grown up. People complain that Miley is only seventeen, but so was Britney when she started baring her belly button. I am not promoting this Gaga-esque video as morally sound, but I think it was a good career move for Miley.

Miley, keep channeling this new you. Just do not have babies, shave your head, and then attack paparazzi with an umbrella.

Long live her Madgesty

Madonna is the ultimate amortal.

Time magazine originated the word "amortal," defining it as someone without visible mortality and labeling Madonna as someone who exemplifies the concept. Madonna has shown incredible resilience throughout her career and probably will still be producing music from the nursing home. As a side note, I wish that there actually were a nursing home for old celebrities. I would pay a decent amount to take a tour of that.

Despite Madonna's fame, I had never heard more than one or two of her songs before watching the Glee, "The Power of Madonna," episode on Hulu. I vaguely remember being morally outraged as a child when I heard about Madonna kissing Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera at the VMAs, and I rocked out to her 2008 hit, "4 Minutes," featuring Justin Timberlake. Other than rumors of her relationships with A-Rod and 23-year-old Brazilian model Jesus Luz, Madonna has been completely off my pop radar.

However, "The Power of Madonna" changed all that. I became obsessed before the episode even premiered due to the teaser Sue Sylvester remake of Madonna's iconic "Vogue" music video. I watched that video a few times a day until the episode came out. I loved seeing Kurt and Mercedes collaboration and thought Jane Lynch looked eerily like Madonna. The glamour and high fashion of the video completely dazzled my senses.

When the full episode became available on Hulu, I enthusiastically watched it. I enjoyed the episode as a whole, and had several favorite moments. The Cheerios' performance of "4 Minutes" with Kurt and Mercedes on vocals tops my list and was an example of sensory overload at its best. With the marching band playing, Cheerios dancing, and two divas belting notes, that song alone could have been the episode's show-stopper.

Another highlight was the "Like a Prayer" finale. My roommate informed me that the lyrics to that song are actually kind of sketchy, but I am going to ignore that for now and pretend it is about praying. It opens with Rachel (of course) and then continues with solos from Finn, Kurt, and Mercedes. I think that Mercedes is becoming my favorite singer on Glee. She consistently brings down the house with her big voice. When she sings, "Let the choir sing!" the curtain opens and a huge African choir steps forward and joins the glee club. Where does Mr. Schue find all of these people, and how does he compensate them?

The only unsavory part of this episode would have to be the "love" scene. While Rachel, Emma, and Finn all contemplate losing their virginities to Rachel, Schue, and Santana respectively, they stare in the bathroom mirror and fantasize about it. This scene would have been far less awkward if the six characters had not been singing "Like a Virgin" the whole time they were acting it out. No spoilers from me today about who lost their V-card and who kept it.

I think that Madonna was both shrewd and brilliant to let this episode happen. She gave Glee access to ALL of her music, and the show took full advantage of that playing her music in the background of the show in between vocal performances. This episode revitalizes Madonna's career and connects her with a young generation raised on Britney and addicted to Gaga. The Glee "Power of Madonna" compilation album was number one in the charts this week, even topping the unbeatable Justin Bieber.

Madonna has captured another fan. Maybe she is a vampire.

The gods must be crazy

I cannot decide if I would rather be Apollo or Poseidon.

I spend my summers outside, soaking up the sun, so part of me would love to drive the chariot of the sun around the earth each day. My tan would be amazing. However, I also love water and think living underwater, riding hippocampi, and controlling hurricanes and earthquakes could be the best thing ever.

While I have always been interested in the Greek gods and mythology, Rick Riordan's book series, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, has recently rekindled my interest. My friends Jeremy and AJ told me about them over Christmas break, and after making a little trip to Barnes and Noble, I quickly fell in love with series.

The Lightning Thief tells the story of Perseus Jackson, a Manhattan sixth grader who struggles with dyslexia, ADHD, and getting kicked out of school. After his math teacher turns into a Fury and tries to kill him, and the Minotaur attacks him, his mother, and his disabled friend Grover, he realizes something strange is going on in his life.

Grover brings him to Camp Half Blood on Long Island where Percy realizes that Grover is a satyr, his Latin teacher is the heroic centaur Chiron, the Greek gods are real and have followed the shift of Western Civilization to the United States, and Percy's mysterious absent father is the sea god Poseidon. Percy, Grover, and their new friend (and possible love interest) Annabelle, daughter of Athena, set out on a quest to retrieve Zeus's stolen lightning bolt from the Underworld, running into the Furies, Medusa, the Lotus Eaters, and Echidna along the way.

I know that was filled with spoilers, but please deal with it. There are four more books in this series which contribute to one large story arc, and I have only scratched the surface of the thrilling plot. You do not need to know anything about Greek mythology to enjoy them, but knowing the back stories of characters and being able to predict plot points gave me extra satisfaction when reading. My favorite parts were the various interactions with the gods, who, unlike the God I worship, can be as petty and selfish as the mortals they rule.

When I saw that 20th Century Fox was making a film based on the first book, I was apprehensive. After all, films like The Two Towers and The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe have burned me with inaccuracies, leaving me wary of book-to-movie adaptations. I went to see the movie, Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief, on a Sunday afternoon at the Guthrie Theatre with my friend Melinda.

The film was the worst book-to-movie adaptation I have ever seen. Its many fallacies included making Percy seventeen instead of twelve, combining characters and love interests, portraying Persephone as a sexy devil's mistress, and making Grover a womanizing player. The most grievous change, however, was making the villain a stupid demigod instead of the fallen titan of time, Kronos. Because of this change, no logical sequel can be made to the film. I wonder if the film company realized the movie would tank half way through production and decided to cut their losses by simplifying the plot.

There were two parts of the film that I really enjoyed. The Medusa scene remained fairly true to the book and added an intensity to the movie. Uma Thurman played the gorgon as a fierce and beautiful woman who just happened to have snakes growing out of her head and the ability to turn people to stone. I also loved the Lotus Casino scene where Percy, Annabelle, and Grover ate the intoxicating lotus flowers and broke it down to Lady Gaga's "Poker Face" and Ke$ha's "Tik Tok." So good.

In conclusion, read the books and skip the movie. But you knew that already.

Lady Lauper

Donald Trump has made my life better.

While that statement borders on the absurd, I plan to back it up. A few weeks ago, I stumbled upon the Celebrity Apprentice with my roommate, and we watched the first episode together at 1 AM. Since I was not even aware that the Apprentice was still even on television, I began watching with low expectations.

Despite my low opinion of the show, I soon found myself fascinated by one of the "celebrities" on the show. I put "celebrities" in quotes because I had only heard of two of the competitors before watching, and one of them was the disgraced former governor of Illinois, Rod Blagojevich.

Never fear--old Blago wasn't the one who caught my interest. The charmingly bizarre Cyndi Lauper grabbed my attention and still has not let it go. I have been aware of "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" since my junior prom, but I never put much thought into the singer behind the music. Now I'm thinking about that singer a lot and singing "True Colors" in the shower.

Cyndi's greatness goes beyond musical talent. She is a style icon and lives in her own quirkly universe Her "True Colors" video showcases crazy hair and costumes which play with color, shape, and texture. Despite her styling, Cyndi still comes across as real and genuine, as a real woman who knows herself and is confident in the life she lives.

Cyndi reminds me of my other favorite pop star, the Fame Monster herself, Lady Gaga. Much of what Gaga has done reminds me of Cyndi's old music videos. Lady Gaga herself has said that Cyndi is a lot of her inspiration and that is evident. The two New York girls recently joined forces to raise awareness of HIV and AIDS in women.

In contrast with the laid-back and carefree Cyndi of "Girls Just Want to Have Fun", Lady Gaga's style vibrates at a much higher fashion plain. Gaga brings an intensity with her pop--even in her more relaxed songs, like "Paparazzi," there is a drive that Cyndi never displayed. I do not think that Cyndi ever set out to be famous--Gaga has carefully planned her rise to the top and will leave a powerful legacy that may outshine the great Cyndi.

Lauper may "just want to have fun", but Gaga just wants to be famous.